Godmother and Godfather

The godmother and godfather are chosen based on the relationship with the child's parents.

It is a symbolic expression of the expectation that the bond will be maintained through the child.

The history is ecclesiastical, but the evolution is social:

the godmother and godfather are a support and a anchor and fulfill their role in a personal way.

Godfathers and Godmothers nowadays fulfill their role in a personal way and exchange the religious interpretation for a human role: they make fun trips to the cinema or playground and offer a listening ear.

The tradition of a godmother and godfather

Although the number of church baptisms continues to decline undeniably, the tradition of godmother and godfather is very much alive. Just look at the birth announcements. Rather exceptionally, no godmother or godfather is mentioned.

Even now it is considered important to indicate a godmother and godfather. So a godmother and godfather are still important. Not only for people who have been baptized themselves, or want to have their child baptized, but for the symbolism and traditions, not necessarily strongly linked to church or religion.

What does this tradition entail, and what was the role of a godmother and godfather in it?

Originally the godmother and the godfather were present at the church baptism, the witnesses, and for the first child they were mainly the grandparents, and then uncles and aunts. Many still recognize this. In short, the godmother and the godfather came from the family, with the noncommittal task of assisting the baptismal child in the upbringing, especially in the Christian upbringing.

They were also often chosen as surrogate parents in case something happened to mother or father who could take over the education of the children.

Who will be the godfather and the godmother?

Asking someone to become godmother or godfather of your child is a request for life. Aside from announcing your pregnancy, asking your mom, sister or best friend is almost as much fun, and so is asking to become a godfather. The way you ask can of course vary.

Choosing the godparents

The role of the meter and the godfather is now fulfilled completely differently than before. But that does not make choosing it any easier, and can sometimes cause tensions, if one partner sees it more traditionally and the other wants to look a yard and god from friends or with like-minded people. Moreover, there are sometimes the grandparents who impose themselves in that role.

And you can't make a vacancy out of it, because then you risk having to make even more difficult decisions if you get an abundance of candidates.

But I don't really want to talk about who to choose as godmother and godfather. I mention it because it comes up several times in my customer contacts, and you might recognize it.

The new role of the godmother and godfather

The godmother and godfather now have as little as before, no legal basis or obligation at all, but most take their role quite seriously and have a lot of ideas and plans on how to fulfill that role.

In the first instance, this is assisting with the baptism if that is the case, and they are of course super important at the baby shower.

Babysitting now and then, it's a party. Later on trips to the zoo and to all amusement parks in the Netherlands and abroad. An annual dinner, with accompanying well-intentioned advice, follows a little later, and piles of presents are brought in in between. With such, suitable, well-meaning, godmothers and godparents, the life of the baptism child runs smoothly. 

How to ask the godmother and godfather?

When the decision has been taken, and it has been decided who you are going to ask as godmother and godfather, then you want to do that in a fun and surprising way.

Asking godmother and godfather in an original way does not have to be complicated, nor does it have to be expensive. Remember, it is an honor in itself to be asked and most will be very proud of it too. Often it is not really a surprise, or at least people had hoped for it.

Asking the godmother and godfather is a very personal affair, and it's great when you can do that with a personalized gift, so that you can make it a "lifelong" keepsake.

This is how we asked